A little tea, a little chat

This is about The Book of Eli, curiously, a book which does not exist. Upon reflection, if you do see the movie, this will not surprise you. I strongly advise if a book does come out, not to read it.

Things I want to ask:

What the fuck happened to Gary Oldman? Honestly. How could a guy who played the roles he did in Sid and Nancy, Prick Up Your Ears, and Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead go to the US and play such crap over and over again?

Things I wish to observe:

I would have thought if you go to Gold Class and spend $74 on two tickets, they should make it easier than usual for you to have sex. Instead, the opposite is so. You get given these chairs that are so enormous, that even though you sit next to your companion, you might just as well be in the next cinema. My advice: if you are planning sex during a movie, go for the cheapest seats. By the way. I'm not necessarily saying I wanted to have sex. Or do I mean I'm not saying I necessarily wanted to have sex. I'm more just saying if I had wanted to...

The thing that kills me about US post-apocalyptic movies is that they take themselves so seriously. Jeez. Mad Max was made on a weekend on a budget of $50. The people making it had fun. The audience has fun. It spawned a whole industy of American big budget movies that are no fun.

Things you will want to know before you go to this movie:

Don't go if you don't like the bible. It wins. You'll be slightly less happy than a Swedophile watching somebody making Swedes look silly.

I'm not saying don't go to the movie. I'm just saying, but....